Sexless marriage...but donamp;#39;t talk about it...or else.? -

My husband and I are intimate maybe 4-6 times this past year. He is diabetic and has some ED issues. I try to talk to him, but he just gets frustrated with himself. Just last night I tried to give him a hint that I was in the mood....ok it s been about 4 months now...so yeah, I m ready. Anyways, he got all mad and told me to go F someone else becuase he can t do it for me. I replied and said that I would be happy if he did other things too, that it didn t have to be just his you know what. He says that he doesn t have the chemical rushing through his body that gets him quot;in the mood.quot; So he can t just make love to me whenever I want to. There has to be something we can do. The viagra and all the pills and testosterone gels don t work for him. He just tells me that we don t need to talk about it, becuase it is what it is. I disagree, there has to be something out there we can do or try. I just turned 30 and he is 32. I don t understand why he can t do other things to me....or if he is just choosing not to and using the chemical thing as an excuse. If I were to buy a toy....it would just make him more insecure. I just want that emotional connection that we used to have when we would fool around. We are at each other s throats constantly...I think because there is sooo much sexual tension. I m depressed and feeling helpless. How can I get him to want to feel like making love? I m attractive , I earn the money for us right now, I am just so ....and it s right before the holidays...help.|::::|Let s look at this from your husband s point of view. He probably is feeling insecure since he has ED and diabetes and to top it off, you re the bread winner of the family. You need to create the mood by going out for a romantic dinner, movie or some other date like activity. Let him know about the date in advance so he can plan ahead. Perhaps things will happen in a more relaxed setting. At 32 years old, your husband definitely has some sort of problem if he has no desire. Often times this can diagnosed and treated. Encourage your husband to go to his primary care physician to have an open conversation about what s been going on. You both need to go to marriage counseling as well. That may help you get that emotional connection back in to your lives. If your husband won t go, then start counseling on your own. You need someone to talk to. You must act now..your marriage depends on it. Good luck.|::::|That sucks. Exercise helps with diabetes, with ED, and with depression. you may not be able to do anything about this before Christmas, but starting in the new year, start taking a 30-60 minute brisk walk with your husband every evening. After about 3-4 weeks both of you will have lost a little weight, he might be able to cut back on his diabetes medicine, and ...other things will start working better. This does not require any money - just a pair of shoes and some determination. Good luck.