Saturday, 17 February 2007
How do I earn my husbandamp;#39;s trust back? -
I have never been unfaithful to my husband, but I used to lie about money I spent and now he is constantly looking over my shoulder to make sure I m not doing it again. I have tried to assure him that I have changed. I had a true epiphany a few years ago. I realized that I trusted him with my life but did not trust him to love me enough to forgive me for my shortcomings. Now I do trust him but he doesn t trust me. What can I do?|::::|Once a trust has been betrayed it takes time to restore and often is impossible to restore.|::::|Make sure you don t spend money on things you know he wouldn t approve of and make sure you re open about EVERYTHING. If you seem more open than before, it will become apparent to him that you re not willing to lie any longer. Also maybe you should have a talk to him about trust because you can t have a truly good relationship without trust, and yeah obviously there s going to be times when trust is doubted but most of the time you should trust eachother 100%. If he doesn t start to trust you soon then have a serious chat with him! Good Luck :)|::::|I recommend the quot;be so forthcoming that he gets sick of itquot; approach. Rather than make him look over your shoulder, take a more proactive role. As soon as a bill comes in, open it up and show it to him. Print him out your credit card activity once or twice a week. When you get home from the store, hand him the receipt even before you put the stuff away. In every way you can think of, give him hard information before he has a chance to check or ask for it. Eventually, being a man, he will get tired of this and tell you to quit it. When he does, act like you don t want to quit (quot;Are you sure, honey?quot;) but then reluctantly agree to do so, with the promise always to show him anything he wants to see at any time, without notice.|::::|Hey Come on i mean after all he was doing it for you right??it was not that he dint trust you but wanted to see whether he is trusting you the right way....so just carry on cause things do take some time....i was dounting on my friend and i was right i jus told my friend straight and then my frnd was like please trust me but then it gets kinda tough so i opened up everything to my frnd...itry suggesting that ...i told my frnd i ll b wid u as long as u wish nd u cn leave me wenever u want nd now i trust my frnd fully so try telling ur husband the same .....Hey nd come on cheer up ....u wry bout this ur gonna ge more truble so just frgt bout it !!! all my wishes with you !!!Best of luck!!! and gift him something nice for christmas !!! merry Christmas!!!!Gift him with mor elove!!! BYe!!|::::|I know a couple thats going through this, I suggest let him watch over you because if you do try to push him away from what your doing he might think your up to something again. And you cant get trust back all in one day its a long process especially when your married =]|::::|Unfortunately for you the only thing that will gain his trust back is time. All you can do is continue to be honest with him and eventually you will earn his trust back. Remember it s a lot harder to gain someones trust back than it is to lose someones trust.|::::|JUST, TELL HIM HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT THINGS AND TELL HIM THAT YOU GOT ANOTHER CHANCE, AND YOU APPRECIATE IT. IF HE S LOOKING OVER YOU, IT MEANS HE LOVES YOU AND CARES ABOUT THE ACTIONS YOU TAKE. YOU GUYS ARE A TEAM AND IF YOU CAN WORK THINGS OUT BEFORE THEY GET ANY WORSE THAN IT S A GOD CHANGEMENT. THINGS IN YOUR LIFE WILL BE BETTER IF YOU DON T LIE ANYWAYS.|::::|it s just going to take time and each time you do something that shows him that he can trust you, then he will slowly begin to trust you again. Or he may never trust you again...it s hard to say not knowing him. Don t give up, it ll probably just take some time. good luck!|::::|Time is the only thing for you right now. Just take one day at a time . with time you will see if your husband.earn you back.But if not think you know what you have to too. 50/50%.|::::|Do what I have to do to earn his trust back, if you have nothing to hide let him watch over your shoulder. In time you will gain his trust back.|::::|Live your life like an open book. Keep every receipt and write down in a ledger so he can see both. It will take time, time is the only way. Over time he will relax and trust you again. Good luck!|::::|Show him that you are trustworthy. You cant tell him, you have to show him. It might take years to get his trust back. Trust is a very hard thing to earn back once its gone.|::::|It takes time, just communicate with him as best you can. If things don t improve over some time maybe you guys should try couples counselling. I did this with mine and it really helped us come together. Good Luck - Stay Strong :)|::::|Continue in your life, doing as you should. Trust is wrecked very quickly, but rebuilt very slowly. It takes time.|::::|Never lie to him again. Your life is an open book.|::::|errr im not sure if this is the same kind of situation but i wen a family member of mine came back from rehab i always thought they were still using, but over time about a year or 2 its all normal i|::::|you should share pretty much everything with your spouse... why did you hide this in the first place???|::::|It is easy to forgive, but never forget it will take time be patient. Good Luck|::::|Back up your words with actions...|::::|Honestly? He can say he trusts you again, because he really wants to, but he never will...I m sorry.|::::|I have a story for you. There was a woman that went to the local wise man in a small village in China. She asked for his help. Her husband had come home from the war and was emotionally damaged. She could not reach out to him. She wanted to help him and did not know what to do. The wise man told her that in order for her to help her husband she must tame a wild mountain cat and bring it to him (the wise man). She couln t understand how this would help, but she did as ashe was told. She devised a plan to bring food to the mouth of the den where the wild mountain cat lived. She did this twice a day. She would place the food by the den door and leave. After a few weeks of this, she would bring to food to the tree near the mouth of the cat s den and she would sit a ways off and watch and wait. They cat became comfortable with this and became accustomed to the womans presence. So, she then would bring the food to the tree and sit next to the tree. The cat bacame accustomed to the woman and even allowed her to pet him occasionally. After severla months the woman and the cat developed a relationship where the cat trusted her. So, one day she picked the wild cat up and carried him to the old wise man. She asked the wise man, after she gave him the now trusting animal how this would help her with her husband. And he told her that she could help her husband the same way she earned the trust of the wild cat. She went home with this new knowledege and with the assurance that if she could tame a wild cat she could help her war damaged husband delevelop a new relationship with her and trust again.|::::|find a new hubby.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment