Stay at home mom vs.stay at home wife. ? -

I want your honest opinions how do you feel about women who stay at home to raise their children while their husbands make all of the money they call themselves stay at home moms but once the children become young adults and go off to college they become stay at home wife s. Correct me if I m wrong but isn t that selfish and unfair of the wife to carelessly spend her husbands hard earned money?|::::|Any self respecting wife/mom would go out and either get a job, go to school or volunteer after the kids are gone. I would be bored to tears if I stayed home after the kids are gone. You can only cook and clean so much. When my kids are in school I will get a part time job or go back to school. I am my hubby s partner and that means I take care of the things he cant while he is out working his butt off taking care of our family and when the kids are gone, I will start working and let him take some time off and relax a bit. If the husband allows his wife to stay home after the kids are gone then that would be on him. I know my hubby would be like quot; go out and do something productive with your life sweet heartquot;|::::|To address the money issue, the wife is not selfishly spending the husband s hard earned money. In fact, it is usually anything but selfish. The wife/mom spends the money on food for the family, diapers and clothes for the kids, suits for the husband and to pay the monthly bills (mortgage, electricity, etc.). I don t see how any of that is selfish. My mom took care of us and all growing up she never bought herself anything new like clothes, shoes, etc. She would get them from the thrift store once a year. When the last kid began school she got a master s in math and began teaching (and finally has money to buy things for herself; although most of her income goes towards monthly bills). I personally wouldn t be able to stay at home without kids and without working. My mom didn t either. I wouldn t call a woman who raises kids at home selfishly using her husband s hard earned money. And, if that is all he is contributing, then he is not worth it.|::::|Every person is different. Many women may feel being a stay at home wife not only boring, but like being in a gilded cage. Kept as their hubby s pet. Some women take such pride in the care of their home and husband they are willing to devote each day to that. And what they do is worth whatever money they spend, as long as the husband and house are priority. It seems kind of submissive to me, but that is how many women feel.|::::|Why are you automatically assuming that she is carelessly spending money? I m all for both husband and wife sharing financial responsibility by having careers, but some wives don t want or need to work. I have 5 sister in laws and 4 of them are stay at home mothers. None of them plan to stay at home until all their kids are grown and leave home. My mother in law is the only person that I have ever known be a stay at home mom and then continue the stay at home wife gig after her kids have left. They can afford it, so she doesn t work. I think there are a lot of wives who are selfish or they just get used to a certain lifestyle. I would personally shoot myself before I became either stay at home mother or wife. But that s just me. I feel like having a career would be more rewarding than staying at home cleaning up poop, snot and toys all day long. But that s just because every stay at home mother I have ever met looks miserable unless they have a maid.|::::|Mine and Yours! That should never be the case when it comes to married couples and especially when you have children. Working as a team is the most important thing to make a relationship work and to help children grow up understanding what it means to be working as a team. Sharing responsibilities and showing love for one another is essential for everyone...it s a win, win situation. --------------------------------------... Side point: Weather a couple decides on who stays at home or if they decide that both parents have to work. Working as a team is soooo important to the family.|::::|You seem jealous of these kind women whos husband provided them a life style. Do remember, houseworkds and babaysiting is hard work, plus cooking. By stay home, these wifes saved tons of money by doing these jobs. Also sacrefised their career. By the kids all grow up, you want these quot;old womenquot; to fighting in the job market for minimun weighs? Shame on you! Who will spend the husband money, then? younger suger baby? Ya, right, it happens all time. Besides, two people make their life, it is none of others business.|::::|People need to stop worrying about what goes on in other people s homes. I am a stay at home mom, my two youngest are 14 and 17 and my 17 yr. old just had a baby. As long as the husband has okayed it then what others feel is selfish is none of their business. If you are a working mom and wife then good for you but don t down and call selfish what has nothing to do with you. People do things to suit their lifestyles and what works for them works for them and what works for you works for you.|::::|I ve recently left my job to go back to university, so my husband will be supporting us. I don t understand the concept of my money and his money . He finished his degree last summer, and while he was studying I worked full time. We both spent the money I earned, since I earned it for the both of us. He s now going to support me. If a couple have decided that they re happy with one working, the other staying home, then who are you to judge? You have to compromise and share things once your married...|::::|first unfortunately alot of men still believe that the woman s place is in the house with kids or not the real question should be is this fair to the woman to be forced to stay at home and not inter act with societyor to be able to expand there minds past mr.rodgers|::::|Correct me I m wrong, but isn t that up to the couple themselves? If they can afford it, and that s the way they want it, who are we to judge?|::::|It is a mutual decision made by both spouses. It really comes down to what makes them both happy|::::|It s a decision made between two parties, one of which is not you. Why so judgmental and interfering?|::::|Not if the husband believes his wife should stay at home.|::::|I don t think so as long as she s taking care of things in the house yaknow? washing clothes cooking cleaning.|::::|If he doesn t mind, why do you?